a whatever day.

I haven't been on blogger in a very long time. It has a completely new look. I kind of slacked off, but it was for a good cause. I have had homework and so many other things that I don't really have a life anymore. Well, it isn't like I ever had one. I've had this sudden urge to go to the movies lately. I guess I miss the popcorn from there.

crappy days ruin my week.

This year has been so blehish. That's not a word, but the word sounds lazy. This year has been lazy, dull, boring. I haven't had any excitement yet. If anything, I keep setting myself up for disappointment. I'm doing fine on grades. The problem is that I don't really know who I talk to anymore. There's a limited amount of people that I can actually have a meaningful conversation with. More than half of that group will be gone next year. I don't know. This year is just depressing in a way. Maybe I'm just saying this because I had a bad day.

i have been in people's conversations.

One thing that I'm completely afraid of are my flaws. I try not to think of my flaws but when I do, I get really affected. They can tear me apart for days. I can be unstable for days. One of the reasons I'm writing today after so long is because I've been thinking a lot lately. I'm pretty sure that by the end of highschool I won't be talking to most of the people I talk to now. I'm pretty sure that alot of people are going to change. I'm also pretty sure that I should stop trying to gain approval from alot of people. The truth is
i know I don't need approval but I crave it. I can't stand the feeling of not being liked or the feeling of rejection. I hate being rejected. I hate when people leave me in doubt. I hate when I try my best and other don't. I hate when I try my best and I still don't win. It sucks that I try my best and others don't care. They don't care and they are the prefered ones and  the ones who are congratulated. I'm tired of seeing all that…..

I know… I just needed to let everything out.

I'm pretty sure no one will read this. I don't care… I just needed to vent. I took no grammar into consideration. I seriously try to be the best person I can be… It just sucks when I am told that I need to try even harder. I am a good person. I word hard to be a good person… Nobody has the right to tell me otherwise. No one has the right to call me inconsiderate because I try SO HARD to please people. I take so many things into consideration. The funny thing is that I am corrected by those who have the most flaws. I will be the bigger person. I will let it go…

It's a sign.

Today, I woke up feeling fresh, happy, and inspired. I do feel pretty sleepy but that's because I went to sleep at 3 in the morning. I realized, during many conversations that I was having, a lot of people need to be appreciated and listened to. It is like small children. When a small child is crying and misbehaving, sometimes, it just takes a talk to fix the problem. A person just wants to feel loved. I don't blame anybody for this because everybody gets lonely and everybody needs a friend. Too much can cause a person to breakdown and it would be nice if somebody was there to pick them back up. Not every person is going to be a good friend, so you need to know the people who care and are there for you. Those people are the people worth it.

When you can't say something, write a letter.

Change isn't something I appreciate. I usually like things to stay the same. If anything changes, I'd rather it be for the better, but in life everything changes. Changes can ruin our life depending on how we cope to everything. We just always have to be prepared. We can't just give up because something has gone wrong. When something goes wrong, the LAST thing we should do is have pity on ourselves. Having pity on yourself will only cripple you and make you weaker. Time will heal it all. We have to make sure to always keep a positive attitude and face the world like if it were an ant, small and easy to step on. Nothing can stop us…except death or a bad criminal record hehe.

I'm not a big fan of Dora…

People will not always take you serious. The reason for that is you're not always going to be important to everybody. You can try but it is impossible. There are always people with different opinions and views on the world. You just make sure that whenever you go somewhere, you at least have the most respect you can. A person doesn't have to like you personally but if they respect you, then all is good. Wherever you go, behave yourself and have manners. Be friendly and don't make enemies. Anybody is better as a friend than an enemy. Respect others as you would like to be respected. Try to judge the least that you can. Looks don't matter because a pretty flower can be poisonous. 

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. :) (I don't know what that writers of that quote were thinking because lemonade without sugar tastes bad.)

You know that feeling of excitement when you buy school clothes and supplies and you can't wait to use them? I do. I bought converse. They aren't yellow this time but navy blue. I would've liked some yellow ones but I'd already bought two shades and I didn't know if there were more kinds of yellow. I mostly miss my teachers. I thank God that I have the teachers I do. There is one exception, though. Names will not be mentioned, but that lady is evil and careless. I'm pretty sure that by the second week of school, I'll be wishing for summer again. 

50s jazz has a humongous effect on me. It makes me happy. 

I have a theory about humankind. I am no philosopher but I do believe people live to be happy. I believe that a person's ultimate goal should be happiness. It shouldn't be money or anything else. Money brings greed. Sometimes all we need is enough to survive. 


What is your picture of a happy ending?


I already know how I want to die. That sentence might sound weird, but I just know already. My happy ending would be lying in a bed with white sheets. The bed would be facing a brown wooden window. The window would be showing my farm. The farm would house strawberries. The strawberries weren't to be sold, but only eaten. My family would be surrounding me and I would fall asleep forever. Hopefully a hospital doesn't ruin my dreams. -.-


You're a positive joy.


So, the title was a random one. Those words are the first that came to mind when I began writing. I've been in a state of mania. :) It feels nice when I'm on top of the world. Everything seems easier when I'm in a good mood. Below, I will post some links to pages you might enjoy or like. 


I don't know if we're on a garden or a crowded avenue. <3


May your teeth never be replaced by freshly ironed wool socks.

Believe it or not, that flower is poisonous.
Narcissus

http://www.zappablamma.com/zb/
http:/hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/
http://www.youtube.com/user/OkGo?blend=1&ob=5

Yes.

I've begun to miss the old days. Feeling nostalgic brings good memories to me, but also feelings of sorrow. It is the fact that, in only a couple of years, I'll be obligated to move on from childhood. I don't mind being a child, but I don't want to be acting like a 12 year old when I'm 21. I'd like to keep the imagination and spirit of a child, though.

Gryffindor hoodies have proven to be extremely expensive.

I finally watched the finale of Harry Potter. It's extraordinary how a person can become so attached to these fictional characters. Everybody knows they aren't real and tears are still shed at the death of a protagonist. I might be over analyzing this series, but it sure teaches so many lessons. Harry Potter never gave up. Did he succeed? Yes. Snape was always seen as the bad guy and in the end, we learn he was doing the best for everybody. A person cannot really be judged by the looks. Sometimes I believe that good looks only cripple humanity. Many people talk to others based on external beauty. What people don't know is that internal beauty is concealed in many others that haven't been given a chance. I only hope that we, as people, learn the importance of personality and not looks.

Time picked the correct messenger.

I try to see if a person is pure or not. Most of the time, I succeed in classifying a person. It isn't the nicest thing to do, but it helps me steer clear of those whose company I don't enjoy. There are some specific people who I don't admire, but I am still decent enough to them. I just can't find it in me to tell them how I feel about them and their actions. I'm not strong enough to hurt people in that manner.

Who can I ALWAYS cry on? My bed.☻

I believe that acoustic music is more beautiful than any other. It is just for the fact that acoustic music captures the emotion of the artist in their voice. The guitar just compliments the singer's voice and adds that extra sprinkle to it. Acoustic music has no auto tune and no loud noises hiding people with no actual talent. If a singer can pull off an acoustic song live, they've earned my respect. I admire those with vocal talent that don't need anything but their mouths to sing. I have no vocal talent at all. ☻

Is it better to care too much or not care at all? :O

I have a big problem. My fan has gone crazy for about a month now. It shakes and rattles. If I didn't know better, I'd say it were angry. It is probably sick and tired of hanging on the wall and spinning for human's selfish reasons. There is no need to worry. My dad is getting rid of that old bitter fan on
Friday or Saturday and getting a new one that will be happy to do its job.

I do believe this blog is short.

To make up for the short blog, I'm posting up a video. ✌ (I'm exploring the special characters on my computer, ha.)

Sayanora. :D